Our young Polish keeper has a semi regular video spot on the official website called Wojiech versus. So far we have watched him play Jacko at Fifa, faceoff with Theo in a driving simulator, have a cookoff with Rob the Chef & play table tennis with pots and pans. A man of many and varied talents I’m sure you will all agree.

Earlier today I got to thinking which people I would like to see going up against the Polish stopper. Top of my list is:

Jamie Redknapp – This episode would feature Szcz going up against the verbally challenged one in a no hold barred bare knuckle fight a lá those King of The Gypsies fights you see on YouTube and various documentaries. To be honest I only want this one to happen to watch Szcz smash his fist repeatedly into Jamie’s face. I just can’t stand the sight of the fucker.

Kasper Schmeichel – A battle of the International Goalkeeping offspring. A representative from each players team takes five pens and whoever saves the most wins. RVP will be shooting for the Arse, prolific scorer of goals Andy O Brien will step up for Leeds. The winner gets to take five pot shots at the losers bollock naked father who can’t try to stop any of the shots. Imagine Peter Schmeichel taking Van Persie’s balls to the face (pun intended), suitable punishment for the prick indeed.

Phil Thompson – The giant nosed Puddle supporting fuck against Szcz in a nose off, we ask 100 people who’s nose is more aesthically pleasing, like Family Fortunes but with noses. When Thompson inevitably loses his punishment involves him commentating on Everton games for the next year while not being allowed to show any Liverpool bias under threat of death.

Batman – I’m not saying Szcz could beat Batman at anything, its Batman after all. I’m just a huge Batman fan so I’d watch anything he is involved in.

If anyone has any suggestions for other spots they would like to see let us know and we will see if we can make it happen (we more than likely can’t).

Later

@wicklowgooner